Top 10 Fictional Rock Bands
10. Sex Bob-Omb
From the 2010 film, and the comics before that, Sex Bob-Omb is the name of Scott Pilgrim’s band, featuring himself,a female drummer called Kim and Stephen Stills who is known as “The Talent”. They also have their own groupie, Young Neil and the Scott Pilgrim wiki describes them as “neither wildly popular nor terrible”. They were born out of an earlier band called Sonic and Knuckles, and once played with Envy Adams who went on to become a proper rock star in a band called The Clash at Demonhead.
As fake bands go, they’re a pretty convincing one, with the infighting and lameness that most people will remember from being in a teenage band themselves. Kim does a great line in banging her sticks together and shouting “One..Two…Three….Four!”
9. Wyld Stallyns
Another teenage band who are technically worse than Sex Bob-Omb but somehow seem to be the basis of an entire future civilization. Starring Ted Theodore Logan and Bill S Preston Esquire (also known as “Bill and Ted“) this rock band seems doomed to split up, until intervention comes in the unlikely form of time-traveler Rufus. Giving the boys a time machine, they gather a bunch of historical figures who help them pass their history course and save Ted from being sent to military school.
It’s a flimsy plot, the band are beyond terrible and yet the boys still rock out. Kind of. It seems unlikely but maybe one day, the music of the Wyld Stallyns really will bring universal peace.
8. Driveshaft
The music of Driveshaft, however, may bring peace but only because it’s mind-numbingly dull. A band that featured in surreal island-based TV show “Lost” as the bassist Charlie was on board flight Oceanic 815 as it crashed over the Pacific. Charlie turns out to be a heroin addict but really, that’s the most interesting thing about this band.
Flashbacks of them showed them playing turgid MOR song “You All Everybody” which somehow sent the crowds wild, but didn’t feature many lyrics apart from the title. You would have thought a show as full of words as “Lost” (and most of the words were pretty superfluous) would have writers that could put together a decent couple of lines for their fake band, but no. But they did come up with the idea of putting Charlie in black nail varnish – because he’s so edgy.
7. Dr Teeth and the Electric Mayhem
This band, on the other hand, rocked. Featuring the eponymous Dr Teeth, the glamorous hippy chick Janice, guitarist Floyd and saxophonist Zoot, they wowed the crowds at the Muppet Show for years. Described as show creator Jim Henson as “Rock act – far-out, elaborate weird equipment, big amps…” they encapsulated the psychedelic sound of the late 60s bands like The Doors and Pink Floyd (there may have been a subtle nod to the latter band in the guitarist’s name.)
Of course, the secret weapon of the Electric Mayhem band was their drummer, Animal. Based partly on Keith Moon, he had a style that was way-out and experimental. And also very, very loud. He was an amicable band member as long as no-one upset him or stopped him drumming, and a good person to have on your side as freaky-necked Beaker found out when heckling threatened to drown out his rendition of “Feelings” (Animal intervened with a bellow of “Quiet”). A legendary drummer for a legendary band.
6. Crucial Taunt
Another band that knows how to rock, Crucial Taunt appeared in “Wayne’s World”, fronted by Cassandra, aka “Baberaham Lincoln.” She captures the attention of Wayne and Garth immediately, but also that of sleazy TV executive Benjamin, who wants her for his own. But it all works out fine – in one of the three endings anyway.
Crucial Taunt are a heavy rock band, with strong female vocals and a mean cover of The Sweet‘s “Ballroom Blitz”. They deserve the six-album deal that they eventually land (again in one of many endings). Plus, Cassandra speaking Cantonese means that the world now knows the Cantonese word for “excellent” – “seng”.
5. Josie and the Pussycats
Another girl-power band, who have appeared in various incarnations from the Archie Comics to a Hanna-Barbera cartoon series, to a 2001 film, which was notorious for its product placement. The girls are more power-pop than the hard rock of Crucial Taunt but they still rock hard, and you have to love those matching leopard-print outfits. The cartoon was also notable for featuring the first regular African-American female character on a Kids’ TV show.
Josie McCoy, Melody Valentine and Valerie Brown were not only musicians, they also solved mysteries in the style of Hanna-Barbera stablemates the Scooby Doo gang. Brains, beauty and guitars – pretty much the perfect girl band.
4. Dingoes Ate My Baby
Not all great bands can actually play their instruments. Sometimes it’s all about image. And Dingoes Ate My Baby featured the guitar talents of Daniel “Oz” Osbourne, man of few words, deep thinker and possibly one of the coolest guys ever. He may only know a few chords, but does that matter when you have a great way with one-liners? Oh, and he’s a werewolf. That helps with the elusive, cool image.
In case you didn’t know, this is a band that featured in the teen-vampire series “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” at their nightclub The Bronze. As nightspots go, it was more notable for the fights and the vampire attacks than the music (which tended to be on the dull side), but it was good to have a house band who could play on through the chaos without raising an eyebrow. The music was written by real-life band Four Star Mary but it’s just not the same without Oz. And if you’re wondering about the name, it was a reference to a controversial Australian murder case where a woman claimed that dingoes had dragged her baby away and eaten it. An obvious thing to name a band after…
3. Venus in Furs
1998 film “Velvet Goldmine” was all about music, so it was inevitable that it would feature a realistic band or two. The story was based heavily on David Bowie’s career, but he refused to have anything to do with the project, so the movie centered around the fictitious band Venus in Furs instead. The band were named after a Velvet Underground song, and were fronted by Brian Slade, an enigmatic Bowie-like figure in glittery catsuits.
The music was slinky, glamorous and majestic – not surprising when it was written by British rock aristocracy, like Radiohead’s Thom Yorke. It may have all been a bit derivative, but it’s a rock band you really wish was real.
2. The Rutles
The greatest band of all time – The Beatles – inspired on of the greatest fictional bands of all times – The Rutles. Devised by Monty Python‘s Eric Idle and collaborator Neil Innes, it was an affectionate parody of the music of The Beatles, with songs like “Doubleback Alley”, a pastiche of “Penny Lane”, and “Ouch”, which was a tribute to “Help”. Beatle George Harrison was involved in the project from the start, and said “the Rutles sort of liberated me from the Beatles in a way.” The other Beatles weren’t quite so enthusiastic, with Paul McCartney giving Eric Idle the cold shoulder at an awards ceremony.
The reason the parodies work so well is the obvious affection the writers have for the source material, as well as tunes that are well-written and could pass as Beatles’ originals if you don’t listen to the lyrics too hard. The mockumentary “All You Need is Cash” examined the history of Dirk, Nasty, Stig and Barry and was very funny too. They could have been the greatest fake band in the world, but their mockumentary style was a little too inspirational and another came along six years later to take the crown…
1. Spinal Tap
And that band was Spinal Tap. Loosely based on the British metal bands like Iron Maiden, this 5-piece burst onto the rock scene in the 1984 film “This is Spinal Tap”, directed by Rob Reiner. The film focused on David St Hubbins, Nigel Tufnel and Derek Smalls with occasional appearances from crazy-eyed keyboardist Viv Savage and an ever-changing drummer. Classic ‘ Tap moments include the tiny version of Stonehenge, the band getting lost on the way to the stage and the amps that went all the way up to 11 (because sometimes 10 just isn’t loud enough). The songs rocked, the humor was keenly-observed and the outfits were …edgy. A worthy winner of the “Best Fictional Rock Band Ever” title.
Top 10 Fictional Rock Bands
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